No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I will be naked everywhere
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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