New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize