Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize