Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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