Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize