Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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