He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
