WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
