This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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