I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize