i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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