Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Acid is not a monday night drug
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Randomize
