you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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