i just had sex bonerless
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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