yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
