my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
