I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
