hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
