I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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