No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
