His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Randomize
