Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
The beer is more important than you right now.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
What a dumb baby whore.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize
