how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
