i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
