just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I am one with the molecules
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
