He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
