3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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