so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
my liver is dry heaving
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
