ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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