So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize