I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
