My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
