good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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