I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
