You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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