you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Fuck me I smell like cheese
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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