Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize