he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
