You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
