At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
its not stalking. its research.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
birth control should be required to get into college
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
