Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
