I'm eating all of the evidence.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
