I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
