i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
