I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
