Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
We had to coat check the pizza.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
