But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
