I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
