As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
