I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize