Having a random hookup so left but love u
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
i think my cat just said my name.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
